Are You A Priority In Your Own Life?

Self Love and Self Care Needs To Be a Priority Daily To Take Care of Yourself

Self-love and self-care needs; You have got to be kidding right! What is that? Who actually does that these days? I don’t know what makes me happy anymore. I am so busy with work and the kids, I can’t even pee alone. Everyone else needs so much of me that I don’t have anything left for myself.

  1. Do you find it hard to make time for yourself?
  2. Do you have so many other obligations that it seems like you will never Get To You?
  3. Do you feel guilty spending time, money and energy on yourself?
  4. Do other people make you feel guilty about taking time for yourself?
  5. Do other people make you feel guilty about spending money or other resources on yourself?
  6. Do you see no point in taking care or loving yourself?

You Can Relate But How Do You Fix It?

Do any of those things relate to you? Same here, I have felt that way about some of those things too. You are never alone with these types of thoughts, feelings or situations. 

I used to think ” I am a mom now, it is all about them now” or “This person is in dire need of my assistance at this time, I must attend to them right now”. 

I always went and done things for others, didn’t matter their age or what they were going through. I would go and do what was needed to bring them back to neutral and then help lift them up a few levels before saying to them, “Hey, I think you’ve got this now. You can take it from here, Good Luck.”

But then it became a burden. It wasn’t until I became so sick with various ailments that I realized I no longer had feelings about myself, I no longer mattered, I became sick and no-one was there for me. My ailments ranged from terrible depression to feeling trapped in my own body. Like a statue, I was in so much pain everywhere, I could barely move. 


I had made everyone else a priority that not only did I not notice how sick I had made myself but no-one else noticed either. I was so busy with everyone else’s life that my own stuff was deeply buried.

Then slowly the migraines got worse, I have had them since a child, they were never cared for or treated. They were dismissed as me “being dramatic” or exaggerating to get attention. I remember walking to school one morning and fainted! My head slamming on the concrete and a lady trying to pick me back up asking if I was ok, and how she can tell my mother what had just happened. It didn’t matter what happened, I fainted, I brushed myself off and told her I tripped on my feet, tried to use the fence to catch myself, but I’m a clumsy person. I told her the school is a five-minute walk and I’ll get the nurse to check me out then. She boarded the bus that arrived at that moment. 

Migraines became so bad I had to go to the emergency room to get them under control…. for anywhere from a few hours or it was an over-night stay. It became debilitating with vertigo, auras, and many other horrible symptoms. Then I began to notice that my physical mobility had declined. It came to a point of I literally was a statue, who was alive! My insomnia which I also have since a child, yep again never cared for or treated, it got worse. I began to clock-in a hundred hours of being awake and functional at a

Then I began to notice that my physical mobility had declined. It came to a point of I literally was a statue, who was alive! My insomnia which I also have had since a child, yep again never cared for or treated, it got worse. I began to clock-in a hundred hours of being awake and surprisingly was functional at a time before I would be able to fall asleep. 

I Became That Person Who Didn’t Do As She Guided Others To Do

It was so crazy and hypocritical of me to be proactive, encourage and help others make them-self a priority but I wasn’t practicing what I was preaching myself!! I thought I was because I would read books, take photos, listen to music and watch movies. Things I like to do, but it was always after I was done doing something for others and only if I actually had a spare few minutes. It was never daily, it was never routine and most certainly not a habit. 

I had my priorities and to-do lists all mixed up and in the wrong order. Something need to change and fast.

I Had An Adult Tantrum,  Meltdown, And Total Shutdown

I had a full on adult melt-down and completely shut down. I abruptly stopped helping others, doing things for others, looking after others including my children. Their needs were never neglected, but I no longer magically made things happen in three seconds.

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Instead of physically doing things for others, whether it was taking care of their children, cooking, cleaning or whatever that person needed, I began to give them verbal instructions of how to get through that situation. If they needed a service, instead of me going to help them get it, I’d give them verbal instructions of what I would do to get those services.

I no longer “spoon fed” everyone, catered to their needs immediately, I began to shift and balance out the incoming and outgoing energies. 

It has been seven years since my breakdown, it has been seven years since I decided that I had it all mixed up. It has been seven years since I decided to finally Take Care Of Me First before I can do anything for anyone else.

I do not at all regret decisions I made prior to that and I most certainly no longer feel regret or guilt that I have adopted the Take Care Of Yourself First Lifestyle



How To Romance, Love, and Take Care Of Yourself Daily


Over the last few years, I have been working with others more virtually to help them to get to a place of making themselves a priority and guide them in their journey to a guilt and regret free Take Care of Yourself Lifestyle. Now I have put this together so you can do the same!

“But self-care and self-love seem selfish.” “Aren’t you always telling people to not be selfish and self-centered?”

Yes, I do always tell people this. There are a time and place for it. I also don’t think self-love and self-care is being selfish or self-centered. 

If You Are Not Healthy> Do Not Take Care Of Yourself Daily In the Areas of Mental, Physical, Health, Wellness, Hobby, Mind, Body, Spirit, Emotional Well Beings;

You Can Not Help Anyone Else In Any Of These Areas!

Take Cake Of Your Health, Wellness, Fitness, and Nutrition First

Health and Wellness:

Your health is vital. If you are not healthy, you simply can’t help yourself or others. Get your physical scheduled. There should be no excuses, that includes no health insurance. Get all the needed tests were done that are recommended and needed, including blood work that checks the levels of your hormones, mineral, and vitamins. They are things you have to request since they are no routine unless your symptoms indicate a need to check. Why am I telling to check them anyways? Because some symptoms seem like it could be something else when it just might be a change in your hormones, your mineral or vitamin levels that are causing you trouble. Also be sure to go to the eye doctor and the dentist too. Your eyes and mouth health are equally important. If you do not have health insurance, you still need to get these done, at least every other year. Save up money for them if you have to. 


You have to get fit. As long as your medical needs are taken care of, you need to now get into the habit of being fit. If you can’t commit to doing something in your home, you would need to join your local gym. This would entirely depend on your level of commitment to yourself. It would also depend if you need help with accountability and motivation. Also if you are not familiar with proper form, proper motion, movement and how to complete each exercise in a safe and proper way, I highly suggest and recommend getting a trainer. Even if it is just for one month. If you are doing it wrong, you can seriously injure yourself. 

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Everything you consume both foods and drinks will affect your overall health either negatively or positively. Now I am not saying to go all in fruits, water and veggie mode, but the more you consume them on a daily basis, the better it is for your health. I always tell people ” A Balanced diet is one that includes at least one treat”

Mental and Emotional:

Make sure you are getting in control of your mental and emotional health. If you have depression or anything else like anxiety, loneliness, fatigue and have anything else negative going on in these two majorly important areas. Get Some Help and Support! It is OK to talk to a therapist, it is OK if you need medicine to help support your needs and goals. 

Take Care Of Your Mind and Spirit Second


Get in the right mindset that is right for you. One that is owned, guided and dictated by you. One that allows the right amount of positive influences that only encourage good things for you and aren’t a direct benefit for someone else. Without any guilt or regret, find the mindset and mind-frame that works with and for you positively. One that brings you joy as it does for others. 


Being spiritual with yourself doesn’t mean you have to or need to include any specific religion. In the dictionary, Spirit is used as a noun and means: The principle of conscious life; the vital principle in humans, animating the body or mediating between body and soul. 

Being spiritual is very personal and it feels, looks and acts differently for each of us. Seeking it yourself is important, it will help you stay level or grounded. It will support and guide you and only you will be able to determine what it all means and does for you.

Set Up Your Goals, Plan and Strategy Third


Goals are very important for everyone to have. You should have daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly and yearly goals. 

Having something to works towards that is realistic and attainable will give you purpose. 

You won’t be wondering around every day trying to find your WHY and purpose for being on earth. 

Goals need to be concise and written down then placed out in the open where you will give yourself a daily going over to make sure the actions you take that day are helping you achieve those goals. 

I highly recommend creating a vision board. You can create a general one, like for the year. Or you can get more detailed and chunk it all out into monthly or quarterly vision boards. 

The Plans:
The Strategies:
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1 thought on “Are You A Priority In Your Own Life?

  1. WOW! Thank you for sharing this as I always take care of everyone but it hasn’t helped me as now, I am having trouble sleeping and I have had some anxiety attacks. So it is time for me to take a step back and get things in perspective so I can be the mom I need to be before I have a breakdown as well. So I hope your doing well and I wish you a happy 2017 and thank you for the wake up call.

I need to hear what your thinking about this..